My life looks nothing like I thought it would as I looked at the long life ahead through those rose colored glasses I wore at my high school graduation twenty years ago. In my mind college, a husband, and a family were obviously going to happen in the near future. I would happily settle down to being a housewife with several kids and a man who adored me. The other thing that was very clear in my mind all those years ago was that God wanted me to work with kids in foster care and to adopt some children who needed a home. I was very aware at the age of 18 that I had been beyond blessed by two loving parents who had dedicated their lives to providing the best possible childhood and training for their children. I felt very strongly that God wanted me to pass the blessing of a loving stable home to kids who needed that.
Well twenty-one years later I am single with no children. Friends my age are graduating kids from high school and I have yet to start that happy family with the adoring man. Looking back, I have no regrets. God has blessed me with adventures beyond my wildest dreams. I have worked in camping ministry and shared Christ with hundreds of kids. I have worked in a crisis shelter loving and caring for kids who had been taken from their homes for various horrible reasons. I worked 6 years as a public school teacher showing the love of Jesus to kids from many diverse backgrounds. I was blessed with the incredible experience of living in China for 4 years sharing the love of Jesus with kids from countries all over the world.
Two years ago God brought me back to the US with a deep desire in my heart to finally begin doing foster care with the hope of adopting. Now He has blessed me with a home and a place to share with some kids. For the past year I have had a great roommate who is getting married in June. A couple months ago I decided that I could not afford to live on my own and do foster care. I began pursuing a couple possible new roommates. Last week the most promising possibility fell through. I realized that all the possibilities I had thought of were no longer possible. As I began frantically worrying about where to find a new roommate, a still small voice quietly confirmed that it was time for me to trust Him to provide financially and begin the process of becoming licensed to do foster care.
I have a lot of fears. I never thought I would be doing this alone. I always thought it would be in the context of marriage, shared with a partner who equally loves Jesus and kids. I also have financial concerns. How can I pay for everything involved in keeping up a house and a car while meeting the needs of kids that are placed in my care?
But as Romans 8:31 says, "If God is for us, who is against us?" Also, Philippians 4:19 says, "And my God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus." So this week I step out in faith. If this is not of Him, He will close the doors. But I step out offering myself and my home to Him.
If you have made it to the end of this epistle, I would be so grateful for any who will join me in prayer. I have several specific BIG prayer requests:
- To pay off my remaining school loans freeing up an extra $188.00 a month toward bills.
- That God would provide some regular additional income to my Christian school teacher salary.
- That God would provide a more "kid friendly" car that is in a bit better shape than my 1999 two door Civic that is currently gushing oil.
- That I would be able to pass all house inspections and complete the foster parent training with minimal cost.
When I look at that list part of me wants to give up immediately. It is impossible. And yet, with God nothing is impossible. So I look to Him with expectation looking forward to giving Him all the glory for what He is going to do .
Cheering you on, Donica, in this great God-sized venture! "Faithful is He Who called you Who will do it!" You are certainly well-qualified to be a parent of kids who need love and grace the most!
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